Foreign Object


Beat the Champ


April 7, 2015



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"Animal Mask"

Foreign Object is the third song on Beat the Champ. It also appears as the 31st song on the 2020 live album The Jordan Lake Sessions: Volumes 1 and 2.

Lyrics[edit | edit source]

Whipped like a dog, down on the cards
Square in the spotlight sweating real hard
All soaked in blood like a newborn babe
Sharp thing hidden in my hand shaped like an astrolabe

Gonna stick you in the eye with a foreign object
Gonna poke you in the eye with a foreign object

March through the red mist, never get my vision clear
Learn to love this kind of atmosphere
Strike funny poses, keep my weapon hand low
Whip my head around a little, get blood on the front row

Gonna jab you in the eye with a foreign object
I personally will stab you in the eye with a foreign object
Foreign object, foreign object, foreign object

Sink my teeth into your scalp, take a nice big bite
Save nothing for the cameras, play the angles all night
One of these days my legs will both snap like twigs
If you can't beat ’em make 'em bleed like pigs 

I'm gonna jab you in the eye with a foreign object
I'm gonna stab you in the eye with a foreign object

Ba, ba da da, ba ba ba da, foreign object
Ba, ba da da, ba ba ba da, foreign object
Ba, ba da da, ba ba ba da, foreign object

Comments by John Darnielle About this Song[edit | edit source]

  • "When a wrestler has a weapon ... if you watch high school wrestling, college wrestling, you may think that usually they don't have weapons. And that's true, but that's because they're still in high school and college. They haven't really leveled up to the real wrestling. They're still learning. They can't be trusted with weapons yet. Only the professional wrestler is really equipped to handle a weapon, you know, like ... I say 'like a' because you never know what it is, because they don't -- It's not very scary if you say, 'Oh my god, he's got a pencil.' How bad -- he'll take your pencil away, now you'll have no weapon. So the announcers found a way around this, back when. They would say, 'Oh no, Bad News Kowalji is coming back into the ring, and he's carrying- a foreign object. Well, that's a little more threatening than a pencil, isn't it. You don't even know where a foreign object is from. You just know it's from someplace else. This song is called 'Foreign Object.'" -- 2015-04-12 - City Winery - New York, NY
  • "The other song is about this sort of loneliness that eats away at your mind from inside until you’re a shadow of your former self and then you try to draw pictures of your former self to see what he looked like and see if you remember, see if you can conjure him up through late nighttime sessions. This isn’t that song. This is a song about stabbing somebody in the eye with a foreign object. It’s called Foreign Object.'" -- 2015-04-19 - First Avenue - Minneapolis, MN
  • "This is a song about how I, the Bloomington Bruiser, 205 pounds of raw Indiana muscle, will walk directly up to you, without any fear of repercussions from the officials, or the crowd, or from the game itself, and stab you in the eye with a foreign object." -- 2017-11-11 - Union Transfer - Philadelphia, PA

Things Referenced in this Song[edit | edit source]

Live Shows this Song Was Played at[edit | edit source]

Videos of this Song[edit | edit source]

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